Small Truck Comeback?

A while back I bitched, moaned and whined about Ford not bringing the next Ranger over to America. In short, if you didn't read the entire little rant, I predicted that smaller trucks were going to become very popular because of the new downsizing trend.

I think I was right.

According to Wards Auto, which is one of the premier sites and publications about cars and trucks, Scion is thinking about a small pickup truck. With Scion being Toyota's "hip and with it" brand for younger people, they're thinking that a small, slightly peppy truck can sell now.

That's very interesting since Toyota never builds a car that it can't sell. The company thinks there's a market out there somewhere.

But one company does not prove a trend.

However, rumors have been floating around that GM might bring the Holden Ute over to America and market it as an El Camino. While this is just the latest rumor like that in the past three years (originally they thought about calling it a Pontiac, until they killed Pontiac in its sleep) they might, just might be serious this time.

Who the hell knows? All I know for sure is that I'd love to see this with a Chevy or GMC badge on it.

I'd even take the green color.

It's a Holden Commodore Ute, a car body with a pickup bed in the back.

So, note to Ford if one of your internet trawlers happen to read this: either fix the damn Ranger or bring back the Ranchero. Small trucks might be the next big seller, get in on it now.

Right now, Ford is debating about what to do with their Australia division, and this might just be the answer. The cars they build in Australia are made in Australia for Australians. That doesn't fit in with the whole idea of a "global car" that can be sold in damn near every spot on the planet. So Ford might just pull the plug on its Australian plant and just import cars there.

But Australia is the only place where Ford has a variety of rear-wheel drive cars. If, somehow, Ford could take that technology and bring it to the rest of the world, the Australian cars could be saved. General Motors pulled it off with their RWD cars and their Holden division...almost.

I want Ford to save their RWD tech and their Ute because then they could give us this:


They call it the Falcon XR8, it's the sport version of Ute. I'd like them to call it the Ranchero and bring it here.

The only problem is that if they actually do it, I'll have to start a snow shoveling business in hell.

Suicide, Not So Painless

It's really obvious when ad men and marketers can't come up with a good idea and they're under a deadline. After thousands of ideas get rejected, and thousands more die in the conceptual stage, they're left with nothing and the client is standing there tapping a Rolex and wondering where the hell the commercial is.

That is the moment when the ad men and marketers lose their minds.

In a last gasp, do or die attempt, they pitch one last idea. Because it really is the last idea, the client takes it and the commercial is made. Nine times out of ten the spot is absolutely forgettable.

But some are just so bad, so reprehensible, that they stir up controversy and are only forgotten when the public flushes them from their collective memory.

The one's we have today revolve around one theme: suicide.

The first is a GM ad from the 2006 Super Bowl. Everyone calls it the "Suicidal Robot."



While the robot dreaming about killing itself is bad enough, what's worse is that the commercial doesn't actually say anything about GM's cars. They have a 5 year warranty. So what? That's nothing special.

Besides the small amount of controversy the ad stirred up from suicide prevention groups, everyone forgot about this spot pretty quickly. Which is perfectly acceptable.

The second ad is from Audi, and it's brand new. While it definitely pushes the car's main selling point, let's just say there's a particular lack of taste.



What's worse, that the man tried to kill himself in the first place? Or that he was pissed when he failed? Or, is it that he later tries to off himself with the side window?

For all that is good, sweet and holy in this world, what was Audi thinking? While the ad is certainly intended to be funny, and it is in a very, very dark sense, this demonstrates no selling point.

Oh, so the diesel is so clean that you won't die. Wonderful. I'm very glad that I know that now. So the next time I off myself I should try a gasoline powered version of the A5.

Thank you Audi, I couldn't have deduced that without your help.